Daily Mail (London)
July 9, 1994
Byline: Lester Middlehurst
Comedian Ryan Stiles, 35, has lived with his wife, Patricia, for 14 years and they have a two-year-old daughter, Mackenzie. He talks to Lester Middlehurst about life and love.
Who was your first girlfriend?
Wendy Sanders, who I was at school with in Richmond, British Columbia, when I was 14.
When did you have your first sexual relationship?
With Wendy when I was 15. I can't really remember how I felt because it all flashed by in about 30 second. Fear is the one emotion that sticks in my mind.
Is love-making better when it is within a marriage?
It's never going to be the same as it was at the beginning... but at least you get the chance to do it twice and make up for your mistakes.
Have you ever been unfaithful while in a relationship?
Yes, but not since I've been with my wife, Patricia. I felt pretty bad about it at the time.
Could you forgive your wife if she was unfaithful?
Why, what have you heard? It would really depend on the circumstances. It would be hard to forgive her, but I think I would because I wouldn't want to have to take care of the children on my own.
What effect does having children have on your sex life?
It's hard to find the time to make love. Having children cuts down on a lot of things you can do, but they are certainly worth it.
Where is the most unusual place you have made love?
I'm not one of those 'in a plane' kind of people. I suppose it would have been at some girl's parents' house.
What was your funniest sexual experience?
My wife laughs all the time, so it's hard to narrow it down to one.
How often do you think about sex?
Maybe three times a day. I would rather watch a football game than think about sex.
What do you like to do immediately after making love?
Light up a cigarette or have something to eat.
How many sexual partners have you had?
Between 20 and 30.
Have you ever had a one-night stand?
Yes, when I was doing stand-up comedy round the clubs there was usually someone in the audience with whom I could go to bed. I didn't feel guilty about it unless they wanted to continue the relationship and I didn't.
Have you ever been romantically broken-hearted?
That's yet to come. I've had pretty good luck so far. I guess I've always been the jerk who broke other people's hearts.
Were you able to discuss sex with your parents?
If they asked, I was happy to help.
Will you discuss sex with your children?
I will probably be like my dad and avoid it at all costs. Hopefully, their mother will take over in that department.
What turns you on about a woman?
The fact that they exist and everything about them. I do like a sense of humour and a smile.
What turns you off about a woman?
When I'm talking to a woman and she thinks I'm just hitting on her.
What does your wife find most attractive about you?
My net income after tax.
Should men always make the first move?
No. I have never asked a girl to dance or out on a date. Even my wife asked me out on our first date. I was working at a comedy club in Vancouver and she was waitressing. She asked me out for a drink one night and about three or four dates later, she asked me out to the movies. She got fed up waiting for me to make the move.
Is promiscuity ever acceptable?
I suppose it's okay before you are married. But I would hate to be single now because there's a lot more stuff to watch out for than there was when I was dating.
Should prostitution be legalised?
Either that or be cheaper. Seriously, I think that if it was legalised the authorities would have better control over it.
What is the most erotic film you have ever seen?
Crimes Of Passion.
The most erotic book you have ever read?
The thing that sticks in my mind is that my mother used to get these National Geographic magazines when I was a child and that's where I saw my first breast.
When did you watch your first pornographic film?
When I was 22 with a bunch of guys, which rather defeated the purpose. I didn't watch it for very long. You don't exactly have to figure out the plot. Actually, I think women like pornographic films more than men do.
Have you ever had an AIDS test?
No, because I've been with my wife so long that I'm not worried about it and I'm not worried about her. If the day ever came that I was single again, then I might have one.
Would you ever pose naked for a woman's magazine?
No, because I'm not that proud of my body. I'm 6ft 6in tall, so I probably wouldn't fit anyway.
Who in, the public eye, do you think has sex appeal?
I'm a big Hayley Mills fan. She's turned me on since I was about ten and she still looks good.
Do you miss love-making if you go for long without it?
Yes. When I'm away from home it's usually because of work, so I try to get caught up in that. Otherwise I go jogging or walk the dog.